My name

The name that i was referring to is my Chinese name. Yuin Theng. Well, 'Yuin' means perfection and 'Theng' means beautiful. My chinese name was given to me by my late grandmother whom i have not spend most of my time with. She passed away when i was only 12 and the last time i spoke or saw her was when i was 8 or 9 years old. One fine day when i came back from school on a sunny afternoon, that was when i received a call from my dad saying that she passed away and we have to leave for Penang to attend her funeral right away. I was only 12 and brothers were only 9 and 7 years old and i did not know how to react to it. I dunno whether i should cry or mourn. Its been quite a while since i last spoke or spent time with her and on the last day she was here with us in KL, it was not only the last time i saw or spoke to her but it was also a day i last took pictures with. Till today the pictures remains unforgettable. Alright back to the history. let me tell you a little bit about the family on my daddy's side. I have 3 older guy cousin and a little girl cousin who is not exactly blood related to me.(reasons beyond your understanding), 2 girl cousin whose my auntie's children, they have different surnames and just to make things clear I'm the only girl among this generation and in other words i'm the only niece to my aunt and uncle and the only grand daughter to my late grandmother. The name that she gave me is the only thing i have of her and nothing else. All that i have of her besides my name are a few memories and pictures. i can still remember what i've always done when i was 4 for her to accept Christ.I will dance while singing christian songs and always tell her stories. (sigh) I miss her so much and not long after she was gone, i can sense and feel her presence guiding and protecting me while she can. The scene of her going into a big, gigantic chamber where they burn her body is still very much playing in my head and i just can't seem to forget about it. I know that there's nothing i can do to bring her to life and i truly regret for not spending the time i have with her. After her funeral, me and other family members when to her house to take her belongings. When i was there, i roam around the house looking at the picture frames she had hung on the walls around her house. I also came across a plastic bag filled with chinese new year decorations for the next year but she didn't make it till then. My name means the world to me and anyone that stole it and gave to another family member is a big no no! I don't want to be selfish but seriously, its the only i have that's memorable and all mine from my late grandma. I miSS her so much.