Afraid.

That's right, I'm scared.

You asked me to ask You to show me what you have installed for me..
I am so eager and ecstatic to know but when I actually ask You, there will be all sort of thoughts going through my head and I'll just back down leaving the question hanging. The truth is I am very much afraid to know the answer beacause once You answer personally with Your voice and through Your ways, there is no way I can say no or ask for a compromise.
I am sorry for not being courageous enough to ask.